I believe appliances can conspire against you. I know logic indicates that answering machines, blenders, refrigerators and dishwashers are not sentient beings. And yet I get the feeling they send messages to each other--maybe through the electrical system, or all that humming they do--discussing how best to thwart pesky humans like me.
Take for example my friend Steve and his family. They had just done their "big shop" for the week and packed everything away into their fairly new, totally reliable refrigerator. With no warning, on one of the hottest days of the year so far, he comes home to a rotting, fetid mess of a kitchen. Sure, sure, appliances die. But the timing is suspicious. And what of the manufacturer's promise that if the doors are kept closed, a hazmat team will not be needed for at least 24 hours????
Isolated incident I hear some of you say. I thought so too until today. Suddenly my answering machine stops answering, my water filter stops filtering, and my blender stops blending. Power surge perhaps? They all quit at DIFFERENT times. Well, I trot right out to my nearest Target to see which of these items I can replace for under $50. Lo, and behold, there's a sale on blenders and water filters. I get a faucet-mounted filter for $20 and a blender for $30. I still can't screen calls, so I just won't answer the phone.
I take the new water filter out of its box and proceed to install it with a surprisingly minimal amount of frustration. I turn on the water and it does not spew out the sides of the faucet. Beautifully pure water flows through the filter and into my waiting glass. But now I need to wash my hands. Simple. Just turn the gagdet that lets you go from filtered water to unfiltered. Nothing. This tiny little part on this brand new, on sale filter won't budge. I remove the whole contraption, try the piece again, re-install and....nothing. The joy of a great buy marred by an apparently defective or--and this is what I suspect--obstinate product. Looks like I'm making a return trip to Target. With gas at $2.50, I'll be lucky to break even. Foiled again!
As for the blender, it has shown no signs of rebellion. Check back with me after it has spent a couple nights in the kitchen with its friends.
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