Coulda Shoulda Woulda

One of my biggest challenges is dealing with the "shoulds". My therapist calls it "shoulding on yourself". I consider myself to be lazy and uninspired. Therefore, I berate myself constantly with all the things I should be to alter this self-perception. I should be energetic. I should tackle a room and clean it thoroughly. I should volunteer. Sometimes, I have difficulty making a simple phone call or appointment. I haven't had a haircut or color since July. I haven't had an adjustment in three weeks. Granted, both activities had to be postponed following surgery, but I've been able to reschedule for over a week now. I can't even muster the wherewithal (I don't know what else to call it) to pick up the phone to do something that might make me feel good. I am perfectly content to sit at home. If someone would give me permission to do just that and take away this guilt, I would be free.